Stuck

Many years ago, when the farmers worked the fields by hand. They would use a horse and a hand plow. They would have to hold onto the plow and direct the horse along through the fields. The plow would dig down and bring the soil from below up and the top soil it would be put down under. This way it would help the soil to remain fresh and clean. Once in a while as the farmer forged forward that plow would become stuck in the ground, the more the horse pulled, the more the plow would sink lower in the dirt. Nothing that the farmer did freed that plow from the earth. He held on and as he did the plow would not move forward or backward. The horse would grow tired and nothing was gained from this exercise. Except for a mad farmer and a tired horse. In order for anything to happen to that stuck plow, the farmer had to let go of the plow, he had to stop trying to force it to move. He let go, the horse was then able to move and this allowed the plow to make a upward and forward movement. Either it was stuck on a rock, or just stuck, didn't matter, but letting go was the only way.

I am like that farmer. I wanted things to go my way. I held onto the plow, forcing the horse ahead, but then the plow got stuck. It didn't move, the more I held on, the more the plow dug in. I forced, I even tried to push the horse, but it wouldn't move. I didn't want to give up, but the one thing to know, by letting go of the plow you are not giving up, it is just surrendering that I can't force it. I have to allow it to free itself and what happens is not up to me. I can't make things happen, I just have to allow them to run their coarse.

I didn't want to let go of the plow. I didn't want to fail again, I didn't want to admit that I couldn't do it, but in doing so I have surrender what I wanted and put the other person first. It is only then that I can move.