How many have you heard that saying. I have heard people say follow your heart it does not lie. Or do what feels good and it can't be wrong. How about Just Do It... Well, guess what today I want to talk about our hearts.
This isn't an easy one to write, because I think I am guilty of doing this more then others. I thought for the longest time that my heart did not lie, that the direction it leads me I should follow. I was wrong in almost all the cases by following my heart. Our hearts are full of feelings and sometime those feelings are not rational, alright most of the time they are not rational. I hate admitting that maybe sometimes I am not rational, please don't tell anyone OK.
When I have followed my heart and thrown all the cares aside, it has landed me in pain and destruction. I was lost, because the only way I thought was to follow the thing that wanted to feel. Our hearts want to feel love all the time, it wants to feel excepted, it wants to feel needed and when it does not feel that whether in a relationship, marriage or even friendship, it wants us to bale, jump ship, because how can this be love if I don't feel it today, or for a month or more.
At this point we are making choices, we have focused so much on what our heart wants, we have lost sight of what we have been doing and the ways we have not focused on the one we are in love with. See it is so easy to point fingers, it is so easy to say they stopped loving me, or they don't understand me, but when was the last time you took a minute to try and understand them. I look at how I wanted to feel loved and excepted. Men we look at the physical and a woman looks at the emotional. Do your words line up with your actions? I know I could say I love you all day long, but my actions were selfish, I wanted to make others love me the way I thought they should.
When we do not feel like loving, it has to be a choice. It is time we start leading our hearts, we will have days where we do not feel like loving, or we do not feel loved, but love is surrender and when both of you are willing to surrender that your heart isn't always right and that it doesn't know best, I believe you will form a bond that is unbreakable.
Our hearts are full of deceit and the quicker we realize that the better we will be. Our hearts will lie to get us to do things that maybe we know are wrong. Your mind knows when your heart is going on one of its tangents, but if we do not admit that our heart lies, then we will not listen to our mind. Listen to the voice that does not throw caution to the wind and lead your heart away from the fools errands. Fools errands will lead to destruction, they will lead you down paths that are painful and will destroy you in the long run. Lead your heart when it wants you to run to easier things.
The heart wants to do things that feel good, that do not bring pain, that do not bring hardship, but what relationship does not have hard times? If we followed our hearts all the time, we would just from one relationship to another, until we thought we find the right one. It is when we realize that all relationships will have hard times. We will struggle, but when we both work together, the stronger we will be.
Change begins with you, don't point fingers. Don't point out what your wife or husband isn't doing, think about yourself, look in the mirror and are you following your heart, or are you leading it? Love is a choice, did you hear me? Some days we do not feel like loving the one we are with, but it is a choice. The more you realize that love isn't all about feelings, the closer you are to understanding love. Love is being willing to surrender your feelings and so much more. Love is more then a 4 letter word.
Thursday, August 1, 2013
Monday, July 29, 2013
Seeing Beauty in the small things
We tend to walk through life distracted by everything that is happening around us. We miss the little details, or the little things that just can make us say WOW.
This morning on my way to work, I got to experience a wonderful and beautiful experience. I drive towards the west and the sunrises behind me. This morning the sun was a deep orange color, so beautiful, I was watching it in my rear view mirror. Towards the west where very dark clouds. It was amazing how dark they were. As I drove, I was thinking about the sky being a panting and how wonderful and beautiful it was. The dark clouds started to change colors from the stormy clouds, to the deepest purple and from that to a lighter purple and soon a pink. I was amazed by its beauty. As I continued to drive and watch, I saw a pillar off to the right hand side, begin to form. I thought and I wondered what that could be, but what changed from a pillar to the beginning of a rainbow. It was incredible, here before me was a rainbow being created. I don't know if I have ever seen a rainbow when the sun was rising. I continued to watch this rainbow form, soon it was the general half of rainbow, but then it grew larger and expanded from one part of land to the other, it was like a canopy around me. I was amazed at the beauty of it. I pulled over and tried to take pictures, but for some reason my camera would not pick up the colors. I watched and was amazed to see a second rainbow formed, not just one, but two rainbows were painted in the morning sky for me.
In life we can look at everything rushing by us, or we can see that there is beauty in the little things. The creation around us, let us not forget that there is a great creator of it all. He painted the sky for me this morning and it inspired me into my day. Don't forget to look at the little things and realize they are the blessing that was given to you today.
This morning on my way to work, I got to experience a wonderful and beautiful experience. I drive towards the west and the sunrises behind me. This morning the sun was a deep orange color, so beautiful, I was watching it in my rear view mirror. Towards the west where very dark clouds. It was amazing how dark they were. As I drove, I was thinking about the sky being a panting and how wonderful and beautiful it was. The dark clouds started to change colors from the stormy clouds, to the deepest purple and from that to a lighter purple and soon a pink. I was amazed by its beauty. As I continued to drive and watch, I saw a pillar off to the right hand side, begin to form. I thought and I wondered what that could be, but what changed from a pillar to the beginning of a rainbow. It was incredible, here before me was a rainbow being created. I don't know if I have ever seen a rainbow when the sun was rising. I continued to watch this rainbow form, soon it was the general half of rainbow, but then it grew larger and expanded from one part of land to the other, it was like a canopy around me. I was amazed at the beauty of it. I pulled over and tried to take pictures, but for some reason my camera would not pick up the colors. I watched and was amazed to see a second rainbow formed, not just one, but two rainbows were painted in the morning sky for me.
In life we can look at everything rushing by us, or we can see that there is beauty in the little things. The creation around us, let us not forget that there is a great creator of it all. He painted the sky for me this morning and it inspired me into my day. Don't forget to look at the little things and realize they are the blessing that was given to you today.
Sunday, July 28, 2013
Hard Choices
It is time to wake up. We are growing accustom to the turmoil and garbage around us. We seek what isn't ours, we search for what we can't have. We love to feel danger and it excites us, but what is it that excites us? We have a thirst for what is wrong, not because that is what we are, but that is what we see around us. It is our choices that we are making to drive us to this point in our lives. If you watch TV or movies you see that marriage is not what it use to be. We see people walking out because it got to hard, we see separation from it all because something better came along. We see the whole meaning of marriage crumbling before us, because we want it easy. We have forgotten how to feel, we have forgotten what it means to be friends, we have forgotten more then we have actually learned. Isn't it time to take the responsibility for these actions?
Take marriage for example, we enter it as a union, agree to work together, but when the going gets tough we think it is alright to go. But in actuality when did it become alright? If we want to teach our kids what it really means to for commitment, we need to stay committed. Marriage is a union of two minds, marriage is a connection of two souls and you have agreed to let the other be there for you regardless. We have forgotten the meaning of marriage. Your best friend is the woman you are with or the man it is together, not just in easy and good times, it is together in all times. When the going gets tough, you share, you open up and you work together. It isn't the woman doing all the cooking and cleaning it is a joint unity of two people.
It use to be the man brought home the money, but now it takes 2 to do that. You need to be willing to work together, to communicate, to be open and honest with each other. Guess what the chemistry will die, but it is your choice to let it die or work together to keep it. It is time we start leading our hearts, because are hearts want what is easy, but sometimes marriage is not easy, sometimes we fight and we get angry, but the choices that we make is to take responsibility for our actions and stop blaming the other, start working together. You are in it together not just for the first year, but for life.
Stop looking for an easy solution out of marriage and start looking at yourself, because if you want change, it begins with you. Don't tell me it is her fault you are like this, start taking pride in who you are and start being the man that you need to be. Change in your marriage begins with you. I have heard people say, what happens if the change doesn't start helping my partner change? Well, by you changing, you will change and the things that you thought drove you crazy, will start making sense. We need to change ourselves and infect the other with who we are.
Men, if you are reading this, your wives need to understand what they mean to you. Nope words don't cut it anymore. Your actions need to back up your words. It is one thing to say I love you, but when you say it and your actions say it too, by helping out, by getting up off your but and doing the dishes, start doing thing around the house, not what is expected, but what is not. Stop blaming her for the problems and start seeing the problems start somewhere and it is better to think they started with you, and making changes. Don't try and change her, change yourself. For in changing you, you will see a change in her. Don't call attention to it, but start the process today, stop putting it off, for who knows how long you have.
Stop blaming everyone else and start changing. It will affect your life, marriage, relationships, work, family, kids and everything around you. Don't say you have tried it and it has failed, for it is time to believe that in change comes life and it isn't to late.
CHANGE STARTS WITH YOU!!!
Take marriage for example, we enter it as a union, agree to work together, but when the going gets tough we think it is alright to go. But in actuality when did it become alright? If we want to teach our kids what it really means to for commitment, we need to stay committed. Marriage is a union of two minds, marriage is a connection of two souls and you have agreed to let the other be there for you regardless. We have forgotten the meaning of marriage. Your best friend is the woman you are with or the man it is together, not just in easy and good times, it is together in all times. When the going gets tough, you share, you open up and you work together. It isn't the woman doing all the cooking and cleaning it is a joint unity of two people.
It use to be the man brought home the money, but now it takes 2 to do that. You need to be willing to work together, to communicate, to be open and honest with each other. Guess what the chemistry will die, but it is your choice to let it die or work together to keep it. It is time we start leading our hearts, because are hearts want what is easy, but sometimes marriage is not easy, sometimes we fight and we get angry, but the choices that we make is to take responsibility for our actions and stop blaming the other, start working together. You are in it together not just for the first year, but for life.
Stop looking for an easy solution out of marriage and start looking at yourself, because if you want change, it begins with you. Don't tell me it is her fault you are like this, start taking pride in who you are and start being the man that you need to be. Change in your marriage begins with you. I have heard people say, what happens if the change doesn't start helping my partner change? Well, by you changing, you will change and the things that you thought drove you crazy, will start making sense. We need to change ourselves and infect the other with who we are.
Men, if you are reading this, your wives need to understand what they mean to you. Nope words don't cut it anymore. Your actions need to back up your words. It is one thing to say I love you, but when you say it and your actions say it too, by helping out, by getting up off your but and doing the dishes, start doing thing around the house, not what is expected, but what is not. Stop blaming her for the problems and start seeing the problems start somewhere and it is better to think they started with you, and making changes. Don't try and change her, change yourself. For in changing you, you will see a change in her. Don't call attention to it, but start the process today, stop putting it off, for who knows how long you have.
Stop blaming everyone else and start changing. It will affect your life, marriage, relationships, work, family, kids and everything around you. Don't say you have tried it and it has failed, for it is time to believe that in change comes life and it isn't to late.
CHANGE STARTS WITH YOU!!!
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