Quote tonight

Life is made up of small pleasures. Happiness is made up of those tiny successes. The big ones come too infrequently. And if you don't collect all these tiny successes, the big ones don't really mean anything. - Norman Lear

Slow Fade

I listen to this song and it is called a "Slow Fade". It talks about how if we introduce negatives or ad things into our relationships it slowly pulls us apart. It is so true, it is like telling one little lie, know what happens, soon that lie has grown. Their is no such thing as a little lie.

In our relationships, it is key to set our priorities, it is so easy to focus on the one we are with during easy times, but what happens when the times get hard. If we lose our focus, our thoughts start to wander. The more allow this to happen, the more that fade is happening.

You may wonder how to you keep your focus on the one you are with. Your thoughts go to what they are not or what they don't have. But when you place them at the top and say no person can be what they are to me. That means you don't compare anyone to them. When you struggle to do this, it comes down to choices. When something or someone creeps in, you must stop and change your perspective.

It is time to see that we are not all perfect and hard times will come into relationships, but are we going to run or are we going to stand. Today I urge you to stand. Don't let the slow fade happen to you and if it is, take a moment and recognize what it is and stand and turn from it.

The Song Lyrics:
Be careful little eyes what you see
It's the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the strings
Be careful little feet where you go
For it's the little feet behind you that are sure to follow

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It's a slow fade, it's a slow fade

Be careful little ears what you hear
When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near
Be careful little lips what you say
For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day

The journey from your mind to your hands
Is shorter than you're thinking
Be careful if you think you stand
You just might be sinking

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
Daddies never crumble in a day
Families never crumble in a day
End

Take a moment and think of where you are in your relationships. Is it time to stop the fade and to put your thoughts, your mind back on course. Today change starts with you. Don't say it can't happen or it is to late, because today is a new day. Turn your heart, mind away from what is causing you to fade ad focus on where you want to be. If it is a person, then cut them out of your life, if it is porn, or negative people, walk away, because you are stronger then they are ad today take a stand. Do you want to crumble or remain strong? Today make a choice and walk in it. Stick to it and believe.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Do not waiver, no more fence walking stick to the one you are with and set it in motion.

Enjoy your Saturday and believe that you can accomplish this. Stand and turn from the fade.

You get out what you put in

What you put into things you get out of those things. In our relationships our marriages, what we put into them we get out of them. I think we all struggle with this, but we seem to think just because we are married, that we are entitled to something. If you put a percent of your time into the marriage, you are not entitled to anything. Example: (I love examples, experiments...)

Take a gallon jug and fill it up to the top and pour it out, what do you get out of it? You get a gallon of water. Now put a drop of water into it, what do you get out of it? That drop of water, doesn't seem to want to pour out. See the more time, effort, and everything we put into our relationships, the more we get out of them. I think the key is, we can't expect anything in return. Have you ever said, I washed the floor, don't I get... Or I mowed the lawn. See we are expecting something for our efforts, our labor, but we need to expect nothing and continue to give. Men, women are different then us. If you are a man reading this, women think on a different plain then we do. We need to stop thinking about what we do, but how we do it, what we say, what we do not say. We need to express our love not just in that word, but in our actions. We have forgotten how to love, how to reach into peoples lives without expecting things in return. Have you noticed that you do things, but get nothing out of them? If you have, stop looking for the something and continue to do. You have to work at relationships, they do not come free.

When you first met the person you are with, you spent a lot of time with them. You learned about them, you put time and effort into them, but as you got further into the relationship, you stopped spending so much time with them. Work started getting busy and life got in the way. It is time you stop focusing on work, and start focusing on the one you are with. Work comes and goes, but your wife, your husband will be with you until you are taken from this earth. Your partner has been with you through the good and the bad, it is time to start studying them again. Each day it should be your goal to find something else out new about your partner. Don't be afraid, take the first steps and know what is going to happen, that connection that you thought was gone, is going to start forming again.

People think they fall out of love, but the truth is, you just took your focus off the one you are with and started focusing on other people, on other things. Bring your focus back to the one you are with and know what will happen? Why don't you try it and let me know... It is time that we put our partners first, the more we do this the more we will see that we are falling in love with them all over again. Hard choices, come hard steps, but it is time to climb the staircase, take your relationship to the next level. Don't run away, take the first step.

Only time will tell. But when both of you; the people in the relationship do this, what do you think happens? Again, try it and let me know. Isn't it time to take marriage back, lets fight for what we want, instead of rolling over and giving up. It is time to fight. Stand up for your wife, stand up for your husband. Stand strong and know it will pay off.

Time to stand, time for the first step. Are you ready? It is time for changes, and changes will start with you, with your choices.

Worrying

My thought from my ride in this morning.

You can worry about tomorrow, but the only thing that accomplishes, is you waste today and today is all we have. Stop thinking about what is going to happen tomorrow, see what today has for you, because it is in today that things happen.

Yesterday is gone.
Tomorrow isn't here.
Today is a brand new day, full of potential and so much more. Today make a choice to see today for what it is. Don't waste it worrying about what happened yesterday and don't worry about tomorrow. Both of those days aren't here or are long gone.

When I was growing up, I heard a saying. Tomorrow does not come, because when you say tomorrow it is in the future, but today is here.

Life Struggles

We all have struggles in life, what we do with them makes us who we are.

Today, don't surrender to the things that try and control you, stand up and fight. Stand up and don't be afraid of those things anymore, because no longer do you need to give in, you don't need to give into the feelings, into the pressures of others, for today you know who you are and today is the start of a new way. 

Today is about starting a new way and you can make that choice. You can stand and you can believe. It is not about the failures of the past, but about the realization that you can do it. Stand up and believe in yourself.

The Next Step

Life is like staircase and when one of the stairs end we run into the next step, just like a wall. Some of us don't climb up to the the next step, because it is to scary, or the step is to big. Then their are some that have realized the only to learn, to grow is to climb. The struggles in the climb try and hold these people down, but they want more.

In my life I was one of the people that saw the stair as to big, I saw all the reasons I couldn't take the step and and all the pains in the climb instead of seeing that even though change may hurt, it is worth it. Were do you find yourself today?

The stairs are a way to get you to the next level in life. In our relationships, our marriages it is easy to get on the first step, it is very easy, but the steps to follow get harder and harder, because there is so much that gets put in our way. We start having the feelings of growing tired and weary, or that we are all alone in the climb. We struggle to see what could be on the next step, because man this last step was very difficult, but we just don't know.

On the stairs we can go both ways. Some people want to go backwards because they say it is easier, they want to go down, but they find that in the decent, it is not easier and full of the old pains, the old hurts, the old struggles.

Today I don't want to go backwards, I want to continue going up, seeing the next step. I don't want to go through the motions of life, I want to make the choices and stick with them, no matter how hard or painful it may be. I want to move forward, onward and upward. The easiest things in life are not always the right things. In the struggles, there is so much more. In our relationships, there is a deeper connection if we are willing to walk hand in hand and deal with the issues that come are way together.

Who told you love would be easy all the time? Who ever said life would be easy? There are struggles, there is pain, but how are you going to handle it today? Are you going to give up and say the step is to big, or are you going to continue pressing forward? I want to urge you that the climb is worth it, because the way down is full of worse things then the way up. I have tried the downward path and it hurts, but even though the climb is high, it is full of life and more.

Don't be afraid, for today is a new day. It is the first day of the rest of your life. Are you ready to take the climb, or do you want to stay where you are?

Our Relationships

Someone sent me this picture and I thought it was so amazing, I wanted to share it with all of you.

Keep Your Eyes on the Prize

We can set our eyes on a prize. In life we tend to struggle doing this because it seems that a bigger prize is always offered, a different reward. We want to see what is over the next mountain, or around the next corner. We struggle to keep the prize in our view and as soon as we take our eyes from the prize, we become a wanderer.

Wanderers tend to go from one feeling to another, forgetting what the prize originally was, because they where offered something different. They thought that the new model had more bells and whistles, that it had an upgrade that the old model didn't have. Or maybe the destination looked better, at first our hearts were set on the first destination, but then the other one has a bigger pool, or something different. A wanderer is lost and thinks there is no way out of this.

In our marriages, our relationships are like this as well. We get into our relationship, we set our eyes on being with our partner for the rest of our lives. We have struggles and what is the first thing we do? We begin to look around and see the beautiful flowers around us, we wonder if that flower smells better. We have made the first mistake, we have diverted our gaze from the prize and we have looked away. In a split second our heart pounds for another feeling, maybe it is better, maybe it will offer something different.

Have you ever had this happen to you? Now that our gaze is off the prize, we tend to see other things around us as well, because no longer is our focus on the one we are with for the rest of our lives, it is on the other things. Our heart looks from this way to another and soon we have lost all direction, we are lost and wandering from one point to another and wondering how to get our heart to line back up. We have given into the doubts that surrounded us before, but our focus was on the prize so the doubts and fears didn't attack us. We saw only the prize, how do we get back to the prize? How do we forget all that we have seen and how do we lead our hearts back?

All those questions are tough, they are going to be with you for the rest of your journey through life, but we need to make choices. What is the bottom line to those choices, what prize do you want? Do you want to wander from one point to another, lost in your own misery, or do you want to be stable. A wanderer lives in fear, doubt and pain, yes their are high points, but lows will be the new area's to walk in.

Today you make a choice to set your eyes on the prize that not always the prettiest, but is the original prize. Stop looking for reasons why you can't, start looking for reasons you can. Stop looking for the excuses, because today their is a way to get back to the original destination. Anything is possible. Impossible = I'm Possible, the only place impossible is, is in the dictionary. Today make the choice that you want to set your gaze on the prize and walk that way. Stop looking at the flowers, the other models and start focusing on the prize.

Where we put our time and money, is where we tend to focus. If we focus completely on someone else, or on porn, our minds will go their. Focus on the prize and each day you will win a prize.

Just a thought while I write my blog

If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together, there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we're apart, I'll always be with you. - Winnie the Pooh