Sex and Love

Did I get your attention with that title? I have been thinking how to write this and have it mean anything to anyone.

I hate admitting this, but I was wrong in the past, I thought sex and love went hand in hand. I couldn't see how you could love and not have sex. I thought that sex was connected to love and visa-versa. I was wrong in a matter of speaking.

First comes love, how many times have you heard, I want to try it before I buy it, or before I know it is love. Have you heard that? How about this, have you said it? Hard question and maybe even a harder answer.

To love someone we learn everything about that person, their likes, dislikes, their ways and things they enjoy. We have forgotten that friendship comes first, then love and eventually sex, when we mix those things up, we end up with problems. If we put sex before everything we fall for the person because of the connection thru sex, but what happens when the sex isn't happening? It is so important that you build your relationships on a foundation, building blocks. One block at a time, you don't have to build quickly, just take your time. The more you work at building the foundation the strong the house will be.

We fall in love with a person, not the actions, not the sex, but with the person, who they are, because sometimes we may not feel like loving them, but when they are our best friend we rely on them, we stand with them, they are our strength when we are weak, they will help guide us, support us and they will encourage us. We have forgotten how to build foundations, even after the house is built, the foundation is not over, we need to continue to build, repair and nurture each other. This is so important, but we have forgotten this step.

Did you hear all of that? I know I failed in every area I have written about. I based a relationship on sex alone and it crumbled, then I tried to fall in love and I missed the whole best friend part and of course I mixed sex in their and when it crumbled I had nothing to fall back on. These choices I made set into motion where I find myself today. I write to you my experiences in hopes to pass on what I didn't learn. I pray one day I can do it right, but until then I will continue to share.

May you take today and start rebuilding, repairing the foundations of your relationship, it isn't to late, one block at a time. Soon you will see that friendship and love and sex is just an amazing benefit of a incredible house you have built together. Take your time, learn, grow and learn more.