Growing Pains

I have noticed one main thing in most everything I do. People are afraid of change, whether you are talking about change to a new process at work, or a change in supervision, people are afraid of change. Have you noticed that?

If people are so afraid of change when it is about work, just imagine how afraid they are of changing themselves. I admit change is scary, because who knows what we are changing into, but what is more scary, it would be staying the same way for the rest of your life.

I walked through life as a child, wanting what I wanted when I wanted it. I didn't put other people before me, nor did I put other peoples feelings before mine. I looked at life as it was all about Geoff, all the things I wanted and it didn't matter what my wife said, it was what I wanted that mattered. I thought everything had to be about me. When things didn't go my way, I made sure with not hurtful words, but controlling words that they would go my way. I didn't think about the big picture. I looked at the word as what I wanted. Does that sound like anything that you may go through or that you do?

My wife left me, I do not blame her looking back at how I was, but she left. It was painful, but now I look back and I have to thank her for leaving, because it was the cold hard fact that I couldn't make life about me anymore. It wasn't about what I wanted, I had to change. But for me to change I had to lose and I lost. I don't want other people to go through what I have gone through and learning the hard way is not fun, it is painful and it tears you up inside. Then changing on top of all of that, you think change is painful on it's own, try doing it when in pain already. Do you understand my point here? (To my wife, thank you for showing me that life is not about me, I am sorry for ever making it all about me).

I am trying to say, that life is as difficult as we make it, change does hurt, but it is better to really look at your life now, before you go through a life changing experience and then adding change on top of that. It is time to take responsibility for your actions, stop pointing fingers and start looking at yourself. Are you being selfish? Are you not listening to others, and only wanting things your way or no way? Well, today is the first day of the rest of your life, do you want to make a change in who you are? Guess, what... You can do it, but you have to want it and believe in yourself, believe that you want that change, just one step at a time. Admit your faults to your loved ones, ask them to help you. Ask for forgiveness, don't let who you were, affect how you want to be. Today the past is behind you, but what is here is a choice that you want to be different.

Change begins with you, you can't blame issues on others anymore, start looking right at yourself, stop looking at others. I continue to learn and grow even when it hurts. No one said that growing up was going to be easy, just like when we were kids, going through those growth spurts were not easy. Don't give up, change is all part of growing.